caressmelouis:

when u come home from school and take ur makeup off

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snorlaxatives:

why the fuck does everyone in the purge movies want to kill people if crime was legal i’d find a way to erase my student debt and also probably steal a bunch of new clothes

badgrampa:

me as a parent

queenofchalices:

FUCKING THANK YOU!!

queenofchalices:

FUCKING THANK YOU!!

partybarackisinthehousetonight:

some people think life is like a roller coaster but my life is more like one of those rides that spin really fast so you’re pinned to the wall and can’t do anything about it

cravings:

me whenever i drink something from a wine glass

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A list of A+ insults

poryqon:

if u R ever in an argument use these insults and u will make the other person cry bc there R so good

  • half eaten sandwich
  • useless fungal infection
  • literal turd burger
  • Netflix® buffer
  • 2003 fergie
  • 5th president James Monroe
  • half chewed pencil
  • The Commonwealth of Pennsylvania
  • absolute white crayon
  • quiet meme thief
  • TI-84 plus Silver Edition™ Calculator by Texas Instruments®
  • diarrhea apocalypse

guys I need some creative insults help pls

timelordemort:

"i’m dreaming of a white christmas" i sing to myself in the 30 degree australian heat

emmawatsonsdaily:

One of the reasons why Emma Watson is one of the best female role-models of our time. She’s so underrated.

burgrs:

my dad demanding mints in exchange for a ride home

burgrs:

my dad demanding mints in exchange for a ride home

dutchster:

when i don’t understand a post and check the caption for an explanation but find only puns there

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